Bean-Boozled = Bad Idea

Hello everyone! Sorry my blogging’s been a bit sporadic lately, my life has kinda been that way these last few weeks as well. It’s nice to be back and I hope to be blogging more regularly soon.  I thought that today I would share an… interesting experience with you all.

As you may know, I am a huge fan of football (that being the world’s version, not the American sport). While getting ready to go to the Seattle Reign game the other night— shout out to the whole team for their amazing win, and anyone who shared my good fortune in being able to watch the game— my dad took out a box of jelly beans. Nothing much significant about that, I just thought it was kind of weird that he had them.

Sadly, however, it turned out there actually was something significant about that box. It didn’t contain normal Jelly Bellies; this thing was full of pranks and malice, with a whole bucket of foulness thrown in. They were called “Bean-Boozled”. I shudder at the name, and I only had one.

The evil box

The evil box

Basically they are really nasty-flavored beans, thrown in with a few of the normal flavors. I know what all you Harry Potter fans are thinking: Berty Bott’s Every Flavor Beans! I’ve had those too. But these things are so much worse. With the Every Flavor Beans they have a little guide on the box so you know what you’re putting in your mouth, be it slugs or coconut.

The really mean thing about the Bean-Boozled’s is that, even though they also have the guide on the box, you don’t know what you are eating because every color has two different flavors. The sheer cruelness of that is really immeasurable. You don’t know if you are going to taste stinky socks or frutti tutti when you put the multicolored bean on your tongue.

Do you see!? Do you see how mean this is!?

Do you see!? Do you see how mean this is!?

When Dad first suggested we try them, I was going to have none of it. No thank you, I really don’t want to know what skunk spray tastes like. My dad and my sister were slightly more stupid daring and decided to give it a go. They both had brown ones (chocolate or canned dog food?), and both quickly spit theirs in the sink while making all sorts of lovely gagging noises.

They offered me one and again I declined. But then I thought, Oh, but this would be such a great thing to post about! And anyway, they had both already gotten the dog food, so the other brown one should be safe, right? Don’t ever ask me why this logic made perfect sense. And yes, I did just admit that I do things, only VERY rarely, for the sake of this blog.

No! I don't even watch Vines, but please, never say this.

DO. NOT. SAY. THIS. EVER.

So I took the brown bean, and I put it it my mouth. I chewed it once. You know how sometimes you can taste smells? Like when you walk by mint and can taste it without actually putting it to your tongue? Well all it took was one chew for me to have the smell of canned dog food all over my tongue. I turned to the sink and spit/drooled it out as I gagged and coughed.

My first thought after eating the bean was, Oh my God this is disgusting! My second thought was something along the lines of: Even though Dad once said that if we were starving we would eat my cat’s canned food in order to survive, there is no way I would ever eat this again.

Pretty bad, huh? I did not have any more of those beans, and definitely do not plan on having any in the future. The only good thing you could do with these is prank people… just don’t tell them it was me who gave you the idea.

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4 thoughts on “Bean-Boozled = Bad Idea

  1. Mimi says:

    Oh, Emma, what a great blog! I am still smiling (already chuckled) to think of your Dad becoming a “trickster” just like his Dad. Papa would buy those candy pebbles, pull some out of his pocket while he was near a pile of real stones and tell his kids they had to eat them. Why? Because I said so! Needless to say there was a lot of fussing (and if kids were truly observant they would know that his pebbles were shiny and glazed like candy) but they would tentatively bite one and then ” get it”. Guess the “apple” really doesn’t fall far from the tree!
    I have just asked Papa about the “stones” and he said that his Father would bring them home and tell his kids that he picked them up on a job, then he’d put a few in his own mouth and tell the kids to do the same. Papa was a small boy then and did what his Pa told him. So you see this started way back when….. ❤

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    • Emma14 says:

      Thank you, I am very glad you like it! I have heard about the stones from Dad, but at least with the beans he let us know they were gross. 🙂 have a wonderful day!
      Emma

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  2. Gabi says:

    sooo.. ok. I was planning in doing an aprils fool prank on the girls at my house at my boarding high school. Its a pretty strict school. so, is the taste that bad to be considered a mean prank? or is it a harmless prank?. I just dont want to get in trouble with my house parent. I thought about putting the beans in a bowl at the common room. and maybe, so i dont get in trouble, put a sign saying what it is or just “aprils fools” or “eat at your own risk”… what do you think?? would i get in trouble? should i do it?
    its my last year at that school so..?

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    • Emma14 says:

      Hmmmm… That’s a tough one. I’d say they could be bad enough to make you sort of gag, but not so bad that you cry. So if the girls in your house can take a joke like that, and none of them would be super offended or anything, then you’d probably be fine. And I like the “eat at your own risk” idea, or you could even put up a sign that just says “bean-boozled jelly beans” because some of them probably don’t know what they are and would be fooled anyway. Does that help? And that’s a great April fools joke! I always have a hard time coming up with them. A bit early though? 😉
      Thanks for swinging by! Good luck, hope it goes well!
      Emma

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